Pregnancy Jokes

Mel Mealy posted this hilarious post on pregnancy. I couldn't resist.

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q : I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word 'alimony' means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.

Scuba Kate

Kate and Anna found the snorkeling equipment under the bathroom sink and tried to put it all on. It was awfully cute.



 

Swinging Higher and Higher

Remember a while back when Katelynn was scared of swinging. Well a couple days before her birthday, Kate would sit in the swing (an accomplishment, trust me) and was slowly coached into having the swing move. Well she began to like it and ask to be pushed and by the day of her birthday she was a full fledged swinger. In fact when my parents came over for her party, she asked Jarrod to push her and she kept asking to be pushed higher. She went as high as is safe for a child to swing. Crazy.

I scream

Recently on a warm day, we gave Kate an Ice Cream Cone. I think she liked it. It's too bad not more of it made it in her mouth for her to enjoy.

Happy 2nd Birthday Katelynn

I am the father of a two year old. Crazy. We had a party for Kate and it was fun. Dave's birthday is the day after Kate's and his brother gave him a pinata for his birthday. Dave gave it to Kate to use at her birthday party. The kids had fun with it. This is the best picture we could get.


Kate really didn't swing at it but here is Anna trying to.


Kate just watched with Jarrod.


Ethan had a real good time.


Then came the presents. 


Kate liked them. She became restless and wanted her sucker from the pinata so the process became slow as she went to the kitchen to lick her sucker and come back and open one presents.


Our favorite gift to Kate was a toy camera. We had the hardest time finding a good toy camera. All the kid cameras were real digital cameras. This one is a princess one and says cute little things when you take a picture.


Those are my girls.


Jen made this cake for Kate. It was a great cake. Kate said she wanted Mickey Mouse, but later said she wanted Goofy and then later Donald Duck. So instead of a shaped cake the characters were all on the cake.


Kate again did not blow her candles again, even with all the practicing we did with her. 


Anna and Ethan helped blow out the candles and Kate liked the smoke.


Jen at 24 weeks.


Dan. Toasting to Kate.


A proud papa holding Collin.


The Wilbur Family.

Nichole and Dave's baby is born

While we were in Palm Springs Nichole had her baby. Collin Parker Williams was born on May 16th (exactly 2 weeks before Kate's birthday) weighing 6 lbs 2 ozs, 20 inches. Look at the new Williams Family. 


Anna holding her new brother. Ethan and Annalise were so excited for their new brother.


And the proud grandparents. Greg and Diane's grandchild count is 4 now, equal to the child count. Our son will tip that scale.


Jen excited to hold a baby.


And Collin. Cute.


Katelynn loves holding Collin. I hope that Collin serves as an prep to her future brother.


"Baby cute"

The new big brother. Congrats Williams Family.

Palm Springs

I am behind on posting, I am sorry. It has busy. It is a funny thing really. If you get busy, there is no time to write and if you aren't busy there is nothing to write about. A couple weeks ago now Jen's family went out to Palm Springs. Jen's parent's have a time share out there and we spend a week out there every year. This year Nichole, Dave, and Mike were not able to come out. Nichole was about to have the baby any day so we took the kids.

Dan gave Ethan a head start and Ethan took full advantage of it.

The runners at victory.


There are ducks always wondering around and the urge to chase them sometimes becomes to great.

Yes, I am laying down on the grass and yes Greg is rolling a bocce ball at me.


Kate strutting her stuff.


Friends forever.


I don't know who came up with the idea but the kids rode in the sunroof.

We went to the Palm Desert Zoo. It was hot as Palm Springs usually is. There was a large train set. And I mean large. Huge even.




The giraffes were being fed a little after we got there. It was pretty cool. They have such long tongues. 

Here is the crew. 


They had a petting zoo with goats and sheep. 


The butterfly exhibit was closed but we all took pictures as butterflies.




We went to eat at Ruby's. Ruby's is a 50's Diner that we love to eat at. It has awesome shakes an malts. Jen loves the Chicken Finger Salad. Ethan and Annalise love it too. 


Ethan really likes it.


A picture with Papa.


Peace.




We went swimming often to keep cool. Kate really liked swimming. We had to be careful because she liked to jump even if no one was there to catch her. She loved to kick in the water, too. Dan, Jen Barnes, Ethan, and Annalise went home Thursday so Saturday my parents came out and played with us for the day.

Greg golfs several times while there, I go once, and the girls go shopping. (Jen says all they do is watch the kids and go shopping once or twice.) They found this store called Oilily. They loved the bags there. Kate like the kids backpack and purse thing.



I got bored and took Kate outside and looked at the several statues around. The girl on the right has a ring.


So, who cares about a ring. Well, look at the ring. A CTR ring. The same artist did another set of children playing and a girl had a ring but it said "ART." I was definitely surprised.


At some point we try to make it over to the flamingos. 


There was a shot of my parents with us and Kate, but we took only one shot and Kate was got up and was in front of my parents. So here is a picture of my mom with Kate.




Palm Spring trips are a wonderful highlight every year. Great times.